Joys of Journals

 Journals themselves have specific smells, whether it’s the rustic smell of an old book, the warm or cool smell of leather (depending on which kind of leather), or the smell of residual ink left on the pages.  It’s so comforting that it puts me in a really good place to start writing. FROM: "Why I … Continue reading Joys of Journals

Here’s to Firsts

Guys, I did something new yesterday. Like really new. A first. I signed up for a free boxing class at a TITLE boxing center near my house. I was really nervous because I'm really out of shape and I've never done anything like it before. I almost called and cancelled twice the day of but … Continue reading Here’s to Firsts

Update

My schedule plan was hard to follow through on. I did pretty well for about a week and then my period hit. I was suddenly fatigued and really emotional. My mood was really low and suddenly I was having difficulty with basic care like brushing my teeth, showering, and eating. And it was the week … Continue reading Update

The Importance of a Schedule… And the Difficulty

My last post was over two weeks ago and things were rough. I had called a crisis line because I was struggling with self-harm urges and thankfully I made it through without acting on them. Since then I've had "good" and "bad" days. On the good I was having such a great time. Going out … Continue reading The Importance of a Schedule… And the Difficulty

Calling a Crisis Line

Reaching out for help can be hard and, at times, terrifying. Today I didn't realize I was in a crisis until around 9:30pm, half an hour after my therapist's calling hours ended. I was having serious self-harm urges. I wanted to cut. Badly. I was struggling, making plans to self harm, and felt like I was … Continue reading Calling a Crisis Line

Escaping From Life

Sometimes I feel the need to escape from life. My moods can be so low or I can feel like all my senses are dulled down and I'm a shell. A lot of the time I turn to napping to escape. Even though I sleep close to 12 hours every night I will usually still … Continue reading Escaping From Life

Emotional Roller Coaster

Today has been an emotional ride. I don't understand. Is this what normal is supposed to feel like? Ups and downs? Going from angry and on edge to having a fantastic time with my dad at dinner to feeling like I'm in an incredible amount of emotional pain? I literally don't know what to do. … Continue reading Emotional Roller Coaster

A Little Friend Time

Guys, I haven't seen most of my college friends in nearly 2 years. 2 years! It's been so long. Well, this past weekend I got to see several of them for a bridal shower during the day in Illinois and 2 nights out in Holland. I was so excited. I could barely sleep the first night I … Continue reading A Little Friend Time