Cue the Disapproval and Disappointment

I wrote the title for this post last night when I was exhausted from sobbing and trying to understand why I can't seem to just be okay and be able to work. I was called in to work yesterday from 6pm-close, which meant I'd probably get home around 10:45pm. My anxiety was the highest it's … Continue reading Cue the Disapproval and Disappointment

Baby Steps, Carry Me Forward

I moved in with my godparents a few months ago but since taking a 2 week medical leave from work and quitting my job I haven't been home. I have been basically bouncing between different houses, namely my oldest sister's and my grandma's. I don't know why I haven't gone back but I've been trying … Continue reading Baby Steps, Carry Me Forward

Quitting My Job

So, those of you who have been reading my posts probably know that a week and a half ago I got a doctor's note from my psychiatrist excusing me from work for a couple weeks (through the 18th). As the week and a half has progressed (with medication adjustments) I have still been feeling very … Continue reading Quitting My Job

Taking Time Off Work

For those of you following my latest posts, it's probably evident that I have not been doing very well. I have been incredibly depressed, fighting off self-harm urges, and have been crying 2/3 of my days. It's exhausting. I called in sick to work twice (on the 31st of December and the 3rd of January) … Continue reading Taking Time Off Work

How the Heck Did I Do That?

I went to work yesterday. For a lot of people, there's nothing extraordinary about that statement. But for me, going to work yesterday, it seems incredible. When I went to bed the previous night I was calm, but I had been struggling for the hours preceding laying down to go to sleep. Only through the use … Continue reading How the Heck Did I Do That?

I Didn’t Make it Through My Shift Today

I didn't make it through my whole shift today. For those of you who don't know, I work part-time at a fast food chain near my house. Today I was scheduled to work from 6am to 1pm. I was working Order Take, meaning I would greet people over the headset at the drive thru and … Continue reading I Didn’t Make it Through My Shift Today

Surprising Myself At Work

I surprised myself today, guys. I was scheduled to work a 7 hour shift. I didn't sleep well last night and so, after I took my morning Lithium, I got nauseous at work. I was exhausted so my heart rate was elevated while trying to work. 4 hours into my shift I felt like I'd … Continue reading Surprising Myself At Work