So, those of you who have been reading my posts probably know that a week and a half ago I got a doctor’s note from my psychiatrist excusing me from work for a couple weeks (through the 18th). As the week and a half has progressed (with medication adjustments) I have still been feeling very poorly. While I’ve been able to keep myself busy, staying productive and creative, it’s been hard to concentrate on anything for more than 45 minutes to an hour at a time. Additionally, self-harm thoughts have been really strong and my sleep has been incredibly disrupted.
I made an extra therapy appointment for yesterday so I could talk to my therapist about how I’ve been feeling and discuss the pros and cons of returning to work right now. Oddly enough, I made up my mind on the drive to my appointment. So, during the appointment we discussed other pressing things, such as the self harm thoughts and urges and acceptance.
I realized that, with my difficulty focusing on things for long periods of time and my exhaustion and depression, I wouldn’t be a reliable employee at the moment. So, I texted my manager yesterday and followed up and left a voicemail for her today.
I have to say I’m really going to miss some of the people and learning new things, but overall I feel good about this decision. It’s what is best for me right now and, in that knowledge, I can breathe a sigh of relief.