For those of you following my latest posts, it’s probably evident that I have not been doing very well. I have been incredibly depressed, fighting off self-harm urges, and have been crying 2/3 of my days. It’s exhausting. I called in sick to work twice (on the 31st of December and the 3rd of January) and knew I needed a doctor’s note. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to get a retroactive doctor’s note from my psychiatrist but I needed to try. Either that or I would get fired or have to quit.
My work didn’t know I have a mental health condition. They didn’t know I was going through a medication change and experiencing withdrawal. They didn’t know I’d wake up in the morning for work either sobbing or in a strange state of defeat and feeling dazed. All they knew is that I was calling in sick.
My appointment with my psychiatrist went really well. We tweaked my meds (again) and she wrote me out a note excusing me from work from the 31st of December through the 18th of January, giving me two weeks off. My manager accepted the note and asked if I wanted to come back after I was better. I said yes, assuming nothing changes.
I am so relieved. And I am so blessed that I have family that is willing to help me out financially while I am trying to get back on my feet. I didn’t feel capable of working and it was sending me into a panic at times. Now, with some space, I feel like I can breathe. Breathe, recover, and start again.