So, I’m really quite curious about something. I’ve been so used to being stagnant in my life. I’ve been home from college for nearly 2 years now and I have had no job or progress in any other part of my life other than therapy.
As I’ve mentioned before, my depression has been kicking my butt lately, especially over the last few months. But weirdly, I’ve taken some other steps and I feel like things are starting to happen.
- I moved out of my mom’s and in with my godparents (a month ago)
- I started putting together a collection of my poetry (a bit over a month ago)
- I actually submitted that poetry collection to a contest (yesterday)
- I started a medication change (yesterday)
- I got a call from Jimmy John’s about an interview (yesterday)
- I actually went to the interview (this morning)
I mean, I feel like suddenly things are happening. And now I’m a bit scared. I feel frozen. I’m used to the stagnancy and now I’m taking steps, positive steps, in my life. And I am not sure how to handle it. Has this uncertainty, this fear, happened to any of you? Is it “normal” (for lack of a much better term)?
I’m excited and nervous and scared and I want to run away and hide all at the same time. Oh, goodness, here we go.